ABC’s ‘Eastwick:‘ No magic here

“Eastwick” is doing ABC no favors.

The new series, which premieres at 10 p.m. Wednesday, is quite possibly one of this season’s worst.

Let’s start with the subject matter: Was anyone out there really chomping at the bit for a remake of the 1987 Jack Nicholson film on which it’s based? Anyone?

Here, Rebecca Romijn, Lindsay Price and Jaime Ray Newman — taking over for film stars Cher, Susan Sarandon and Michelle Pfeiffer — star as three very different women who simultaneously discover hidden magical powers.

Roxie (Romijn), the most in-touch of the bunch, is an art, dance and culinary school dropout who thinks she’s a psychic; Joanna (Price, the most likeable) is an awkward, uptight journalist who always says the wrong thing at the wrong time; and Kat (Newman) is a nurse and mother of five who has had it with her lazy lout of a husband.

The trio are unlikely friends who come together after a strange incident in a local park and bond over a shared wish for their lives to change.

“When magic awakens, it ripples through everything,” explains Aunt Bun, the head of the Eastwick Historical Society. “There are forces that lie in wait for such a moment. Forces of darkness, chaos, temptation.”

One of those forces is Darryl Van Horne (Paul Gross), a wealthy man who sweeps into town just as we start getting glimpses of each woman’s power.

As Darryl, Gross’ performance is a little too affected, with an odd accent that left me wondering if he was trying to channel Nicholson. He’s supposed to be this sexy man of mystery, but I didn’t find him particularly attractive, charming or seductive.

The whole pilot just felt silly and not terribly interesting.

I’m not sure there’s any amount of magic that can save it.