Grandparents key to children’s well-being

After a trip to Busch Gardens, one of my friends reported the following conversation with the granddaughter of another friend: “I asked Maya: ‘What are your daddy’s hobbies? What does he enjoy doing?’ She responded, ‘He likes cars.’ Then I asked, ‘What does your granddad enjoy doing?’ To which she replied, ‘He likes to be with me!’”

Research supports what we all know, grandparents can play important roles in the lives of their grandchildren.

“Grandchildren who receive more affection from their grandparents have higher self-esteem levels than those who experience little or no affection from their grandparents,” reports a study entitled Longitudinal Study of Generations from the University of Southern California.

This same study reported that the gender of the grandparent makes no difference. Emotional closeness with either grandparent leads to higher self-esteem in grandchildren.

New Opportunities

New studies show that spending time with grandparents results in fewer behavior problems and more pro-social behavior in adolescents, according to a study in the Journal of Family Psychology. What proved to be most encouraging was that “the effects were strongest among children in single-parent or step-family households. It’s possible (grandparents) can reduce the negative influence of parents separating and be a resource for children who are going through these family changes,” researchers believe.

Roles of Grandparents

Grandparents serve as family historians, mentors and teachers, nurturers, role models and playmates, according to the BYU Education Website. Maybe because grandparents are less concerned about the normal age-related misbehaviors that annoy parents, they become experts at seeing life happen as the daily routine trudges forward. While parents scurry about to meet the demands of the day, grandparents break into song with their grandchildren, or listen to fantastic stories, or marvel over new discoveries. “Grandmom, look at this!” “Wow, it’s so beautiful. Where did you find this gorgeous rock?” “I found it in the flower garden. Mom is working there.”

Passing on Memories

Educators suggest that grandparents pass on their heritage through homemade videos and through words. Alma Rountrey, who was born in 1914 and lives in Altavista, published a book of memories titled Hunting Quarter Poems. Below is a poem about her grandmother that she has shared with future generations.

A Tuft of Hair

That summer at Grandma’s house/ I came to the dinner table late. / Standing behind my uncle’s chair /I noticed — / From his slicked-down hair / A tuft stood out in back. / Ah! / Temptation. (End Stanza)// I jerked it. / He swore and almost caught me, / But I escaped. / I heard my Grandma say, / That’s no way to talk to a child.” / Did you see what she did?” he asked./ Grandma blessed the food. / Loudly. (End Stanza)//  And I?/ I was hiding inside Grandma’s wardrobe,/ Trying to suppress my sobs,/ Along with my giggles.

There are all kinds of grandparents. At their best, they create positive changes in their grandchildren.